40 Things to Say to An Upset Friend to Lift Their Spirit (and What NOT to Say)

When a friend is upset, whether if they’re upset with you or something else, it can be difficult to know what to say to calm them down.

You may feel like you’re walking on eggshells, not wanting to say the wrong thing and make the situation worse.

But don’t worry – we’ve got you covered!

In this blog post, I’ll share some examples of what you can say to a friend who is upset to help them feel more relaxed.

So next time your friend is upset, don’t stress – just follow these simple steps!

What to Say When Your Friend Are Upset about Something

When your friend is upset, all they need is for you to be present and listen to what they have to say.

It can be helpful to offer some words of encouragement, but ultimately, what they need most is for you to just be there with them.

If you’re not sure what to say, here are some examples of things you could say:

  1. “I’m sorry about what happened. But I’m here to listen. Anytime.”
  2. “Sounds like you’re feeling really upset right now. Wanna talk about it?”
  3. “Can you tell me about what happened?”
  4. “I can see how that would be really confusing/frustrating/upsetting. Don’t worry, they’re all temporary. I’ll come along to help you get through this.”
  5. “I think you need some time to yourself. But I’ll always be here when you’re ready to talk.”
  6. “That sounds really difficult. Thank you for sharing that with me.”
  7. “That makes a lot of sense why you feel upset.”
  8. “I see how that would be hurtful. *hugs*”
  9. “That sounds really tough. I can’t believe how strong you are.”
  10. “Do you remember that time when you _______ and you felt really upset? I feel like you’re a lot like that now. But I promise things will get better like it did to you.”
  11. “I really think it’s amazing how you’re handling this.”
  12. “You’re one of the strongest people I know.”
  13. “Hey, let’s go get some ice cream! It’ll make you feel better. Bills on me!”
  14. “Do you want to play your favorite game? I’ll beat you this time for sure!”
  15. “Want me to sing you a song? It always makes me feel better.”
  16. “I made you your favorite food! Come eat it with me.”
  17. “Wow, you’ve been through a lot lately. You’re really handling this well.”
  18. “You’re allowed to feel upset. This doesn’t mean you’re weak.”
  19. “I’m always here for you. You can call me anytime, day or night.”
  20. “Thank you for opening up to me. I really appreciate it.”
  21. “I’m glad you told me how you’re feeling. I want to help you in any way I can.”
  22. “You’re not alone in this. I’m here for you, every step of the way.”
  23. “I’m worried about you. Please tell me what I can do to help.”
  24. “Is there anything I can do to make this easier for you?”
  25. “Please let me know if there’s anything I can do to help you through this.”

What to Say When Your Friend Are Upset with You

When you made a mistake, and your friend is upset with you, it can be really hard to know what to do or what to say.

You might feel like you’re in uncharted territory, and that any wrong move could make the situation worse.

Here are what you can say to break the situation to resume your friendship:

(Please remember that whenever you could, please try to talk to them in person. This can really means a lot to them.)

  1. “I’m sorry about what happened. I know I made a mistake, and I’m willing to do what it takes to make things right.”
  2. “I know I hurt you, and I’m really sorry about that. Can we please talk about this so I can try to make things better?”
  3. “I’m sorry I said/did that. I was wrong, and I want to apologize. Please forgive me.”
  4. “I know what I did wasn’t okay. Can we please talk about this so I can apologize and make things right?”
  5. “I’m sorry about what I did. It was really wrong of me and I feel terrible.”
  6. “There’s no excuse for what I did. I know that, and I’m really sorry.”
  7. “I wish I could take back what I did, but I know that’s not possible. All I can do is apologize and try to make it up to you.”
  8. “I’m sorry for what I did. Will you please forgive me?”
  9. “I know I messed up, and I’m really sorry. I hope you can forgive me.”
  10. “What can I do to make it up to you? I’ll do anything.”
  11. “I know it’s not enough, but I really am sorry.”
  12. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what else to say except that I’m really sorry and I hope you can forgive me.”
  13. “I was wrong and I want to make things right. Please forgive me.”
  14. “I know an apology isn’t enough, but I really am sorry for what I did. I’ll do better next time.”
  15. “I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. I’m really sorry.”

What You Should Avoid Saying When Your Friend is Upset

Please avoid saying these kinds of words to your friend when they’re upset. Not only it might hurt them further, it can also irrevocably damage your friendship.

  1. “Calm down.”
  2. “It’s not that big of a deal.”
  3. “Stop overreacting.”
  4. “Just let it go.”
  5. “I don’t know what you’re so worked up about.”
  6. “You’re just making a big deal out of nothing.”
  7. “It’s not that big of a deal.”
  8. “Stop being so sensitive.”
  9. “You’re overthinking this.”
  10. “Just relax.”

Instead, try to be understanding and supportive. Your friend will appreciate it!

And if you’re ever feeling upset, don’t hesitate to reach out to your friends – they’ll be more than happy to return the favor. 🙂

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